If you’ve ever felt unsure about how to blend essential oils so they actually work — not just smell good — this guide will give you the clarity and confidence to get started.
You’ve got a growing collection of essential oils and you’re ready to start blending — maybe for sleep, emotional support, energy, or just a calmer household. But when you mix a few together, the result doesn’t quite hit the mark. It might smell off, feel unbalanced, or simply not do what you hoped it would.
I know that feeling well. Even when you’re using beautiful, high-quality oils, it’s easy to end up with a blend that’s too strong, doesn’t smell right, or doesn’t actually work. And when you’re pouring your energy into supporting your child’s emotions, managing meltdowns, or finding a moment of peace in a chaotic day, you want something that truly helps — not just a nice scent.
I’ve made all the same mistakes — calming rollers that didn’t calm anyone, diffuser blends that seemed to make things worse, and wasted drops of oil I couldn’t afford to throw away. It’s frustrating when your intention is there but the result misses the mark.
That’s why I started using the 30-50-20 rule — a simple method that helps you blend essential oils in a way that’s both beautifully balanced and genuinely effective. When your oils work together in both scent and purpose, the difference is noticeable. They feel right, and they work better.
In this post, I’ll show you exactly how to use this rule to create your own blends with confidence — whether you’re looking to calm big emotions, boost focus, support sleep, or lift your mood. Let’s get started.
Why Blending Matters
Blending isn’t just about creating a nice smell. When you combine the right oils with intention, you’re creating synergy — a blend that’s more powerful than the sum of its parts.
A well-made blend can:
I’ve seen firsthand how a thoughtful blend can shift the mood in a room, help regulate energy levels, or provide a little emotional buffer when things feel intense.
The 30-50-20 Rule Explained
So how do you actually create a blend that works?
The 30-50-20 rule is my go-to framework. It’s not a hard rule — think of it more as a helpful guide, especially when you’re getting started.
Here’s how it breaks down:
When you blend in these rough proportions, you’re layering oils in a way that appeals to both the limbic system (your brain’s emotional centre) and the body (through topical or aromatic benefits). This makes your blend more effective, not just pleasant.
Top Notes (30%) – The First Impression
Top notes are your attention-grabbers. They lift the blend, add freshness, and give you that immediate “ahhh” response when you first smell it.
I often use top notes in morning blends or when my boys need a little motivation to get moving. Citrus oils in particular are known for their mood-lifting and immune-supporting properties, so they’re always on high rotation here.
Middle Notes (50%) – The Heart and Soul
Middle notes are the emotional centre of your blend. They help connect the brightness of the top notes with the depth of the base notes, and often have powerful therapeutic benefits.
I reach for middle notes when I’m creating blends to support emotional regulation — both for myself and for my boys. Lavender and Chamomile are favourites at bedtime, while Clary Sage and Geranium are incredibly grounding when emotions are big and unpredictable.
Base Notes (20%) – The Foundation
Base notes are deep, rich, and grounding. They give your blend lasting power and often provide the most calming, stabilising effects.
Vetiver is my go-to when things feel overwhelming or dysregulated. Just one drop in a roller or diffuser blend adds a sense of calm and focus that we all seem to respond to — especially my youngest, who has ADHD and finds transitions tricky.
Putting It All Together
Let’s say you want to make a blend to help your child wind down before bed. Here’s a simple way to apply the 30-50-20 rule:
Bedtime Roller Blend
Add the oils to a 10 mL roller bottle and top up with Fractionated Coconut Oil. Roll onto wrists, spine, or the soles of the feet at bedtime.
You can also adapt this to a diffuser by using 1-2 drops of each oil instead — just keep the proportions similar.
Tips for Blending With Confidence
Want to Try a Few Recipes?
Once you get the hang of blending, it becomes second nature — and genuinely enjoyable. You’ll start to notice which oils pair well together, what your family responds to, and which blends become staples in your emotional toolkit.
Final Thoughts
Blending essential oils doesn’t need to be complicated — but it does benefit from a little structure and purpose. The 30-50-20 rule gives you the foundation to start experimenting confidently, knowing that your blends will not only smell beautiful, but actually support the emotional and physical needs you’re aiming to meet.
And if you ever need help creating a blend for your family or figuring out what oils to try together, join my free Facebook group, Kids & Big Emotions, where you’ll find real support, practical tools, and emotional wellbeing that fits your life.
